Reflect. Love.

My friend Jason Hayes has a great post here and really speaks to my heart about some things that God has been talking to me about through his Word lately.  I’ve been praying so much about my future and what God wants me to do as far as ministry goes and I’ve been teaching so much more, and so I’ve been studying more and had more on my mind.  But God just began speaking to my heart about the reasons that I do some things that I do.  This means that I’ve been looking at the reasons that I blog, twitter, etc.  Do I desire to be known or do I desire to make HIM known?  

Here is my favorite part of what Jason said: 

“The more that I interact with these things I am reminded that they in themselves are not bad.  Instead, I just need to be careful of the bad thinking that often comes along with them for me.  This thinking tells me that I am “somebody” and deserve to be talked about.  This thinking encourages me to talk as opposed to listen.  This thinking tells me to spend more time working on the “Jason Hayes brand” as opposed to telling the story of God and others.  This thinking tricks me into believing that a few more posts or a few more Tweets will get me noticed.  This thinking tells me that gaining readers is more important than providing quality content. This thinking flies in the face of humility and promotes my own personal ego trips via the blog, Facebook, and Twitter.”

You can find Jason’s blog on the side of this blog.  Or you can see it here.  

So I’ve been careful this week with myself and I’ve been noticing alot more of how others blog, tweet, facebook, whatever and I never want to be someone who just wants to “get my name out” or make myself more famous.  The point of this blog is to make Him famous and to hopefully provide content that is a blessing to others, promote discussion and dialogue with others about Jesus and the church or to help stir the thoughts of some about Jesus or what it means to be a follower of Jesus.  So I have to ask myself every time I blog, what are my intentions?  I no longer check my stats to see how many people have been reading or my followers on twitter to see how many that I have accumulated (even though half of them don’t even know me!)  I don’t want my future to include a heart that’s about myself and it’s a constant battle that I think we ALL have to fight.  I see too many people in ministry that are more interested in themselves than they are in Jesus.  Too many people in ministry are more about their own agendas than God’s and it has really challenged me about my future.  I want to be genuine and I want God to use me to influence the kingdom.  However, I’m not sure I ever want to be noticed or recognized for it anymore because of what I know can happen inside of my heart.  Pride always comes before the fall.  

So, what are our intentions?  Do we desire to make Him known or to be known?  Why are we in ministry and why are we starting new ministries?  These are ALL questions that I’m asking myself because God has been bringing them to my mind lately as a result of my questions to Him of what does my future hold?  I never want to be someone who only does something to be noticed or celebrated and I pray now each day that God reveals to my heart the areas that I am doing this.  I think it’s a question that should be asked of everybody, not just those in ministry.  If we all had the attitude of Paul, I think we could make the church and ultimately the world, a better place to live.  

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.”- Philippians 2:3

Reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

Is anyone else interested in doing this with me?  I’ve always felt like God desires for us to use our skills and knowledge to help and love the world around us.  We always have opportunities to change the world around us through love and simply serving others and I suppose that I’m drawn to this one because I already do home improvement for a living.  Anyway, anyone interested?  Let me know!

Reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

I don’t know that I have ever gone from one extreme of emotion to the opposite extreme in such a short amount of time like I did today.  Ashley and I went to our first doctor’s appointment today and while the doctor was doing the ultrasound, we discovered that our baby does not have a heartbeat.  My first thought when the ultrasound started was that I could see the baby, as tiny as it was, curled up inside of my wife’s belly.  I felt elation as I stood there.  In the next split second, I learned that my baby does not have a heartbeat.  In that next second, my heart broke.  I never thought about this happening in this whole process.  I was ready to be a dad and ready to raise a child.  We have been preparing for this and everyone around us was so excited.  My next thoughts were, “why did this happen?  why would God do this?”  I wish I had the answers to those questions, but I don’t.  It could be a number of reasons.  Ashley and I came home and I sat on the front porch for a while and just cried.  Then went into the bedroom and cried and prayed with my wife.  Then we just sat.  We were so ready and so excited.  However, here are the facts:  God is sovereign.  He knows all of the details that we don’t and he knows that although this is an incredibly painful time for both of us and our families, it is best for us in the future somehow.  We may never know why or how.  I find hope in that tonight.  I wish I could say that I didn’t have anymore questions, but I do.  I have lots of questions still and probably will in the coming weeks.  

We understand that this happens to so many people, but that doesn’t change the fact that we lost something that was already so dear to us, no matter how young the baby was.  We have an appointment in a week in order to be 100% sure that this is the case.  We are praying for a miracle and hoping for the best for now.

I think God’s been preparing my heart for this the past couple of weeks.  I’ve listened to a podcast from Louie Giglio about hope and Ashley and I listened to it one afternoon a couple of weeks ago.  It’s about finding hope when the bottom falls out of life.  It’s an incredible message and you can find it online (The Anchor of Hope).  He drives the point home that Jesus says that in HIM we find peace (John 16:33).  Peace is found in Jesus and hope is found in Jesus Christ, the anchor of our hope.  Here is where I find hope in our situation:  ”I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have trouble.  But take heart; I have overcome the world.”  I find comfort in knowing Jesus.  I never saw this coming and it hit me like a mack truck.  The good news is that Jesus has overcome the world and he has overcome our situation.  He knows our future and is currently sitting with us during our time of pain.  Please pray for my wife and I.  Thank you for your support.  

As always, reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

So the Vols haven’t ended up being all that I hoped that they would be this season.  I’m not giving up on them yet to finish with a winning record, however, they are pretty much out of the race for the national title and probably the SEC title.  So, who do you cheer for when your team is done?  Here is who I have narrowed it down to….

First, Tim Tebow and the Florida Gators.  I realize that this is a travesty to most Tennessee fans, however, I choose to cheer for the good guys and from what I hear, Tebow seems to be a good guy and a positive role model.  I would like to see him win another Heisman and add a national title as a starting QB to go with it.  

Second, is the Georgia Bulldogs.  Georgia’s coach, Mark Richt is a Christ follower and has said that he only wishes to “serve others and not himself”.  That’s an amazing attitude for a coach today.  It’s not unusual to find a football coach that is only concerned about the money that they bring in and the games that they win.  I’m sure that coach Richt is concerned about the team and the games that they win, however, he understands that it is not his highest priority.  

I believe that these are 2 people that will represent Christ if they are placed on one of the nation’s largest stages and that’s why I’m cheering for them.  They play November 1 in Jacksonville and I can’t wait to watch the game if their seasons continue to go in the direction that they are currently going.  

I jumped off on a football tangent tonight.  I just wanted to give these guys the credit that is due to them for their positive example for Christ.  I hope they continue to shine a light and live for the renown of our Savior.  

By the way….who are YOU cheering for to win it all?

Reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

I don’t know if I’ve ever been more excited about television in my life.

Officially one of my favorite songs now.  Be looking for this one the next time I lead worship.  

I also found a great article on churchmarketingsucks.com.  The article is here.  I can’t wait to read this book and see what his perspective is.  Too many places just want to get people in the door and could care less about the discipleship of those that they have.  The fact is, the church was built to reach outside of the walls and to teach and disciple others inside the walls.  That’s not happening in enough places.  I’m looking forward to reading this one.

Ben Arment had a great post here.  I don’t know him, but read his blog frequently.  He has some wisdom and some experience in church planting and he currently works at Catalyst.  He usually is writing some great stuff on his blog and he hits the nail on the head here.

I’ve had a ton of stuff going through my head lately and a few things that God is teaching me right now.  There are a few things that he has really set me straight on.  The past couple of years has been a ride for me and it’s about to get even more interesting with “the bean” coming.  Yes, that is what we’re calling our unborn child as of right now…..”the bean”.  Anyway, a few years ago I just became a little disgruntled I guess with a few things going on inside the church.  Not any church specifically, but overall in the body of Christ.  I’ve been very critical and God revealed that to me.  I’ve been so focused on the method instead of the message.  God showed me that it’s about Jesus and when the method has Jesus at the core of it, then it’s a right method.  It’s sometimes the motives that get in the way and I’m not someone who can question those.  So, in other words:  I’m tired of being disgruntled about what others are doing, right or wrong.  It’s time to be looking forward to what Jesus is doing and it’s time to join in that, whatever the method is.  The most effective way for people to learn about who Jesus is and what he is about and how he loves them is the method and I don’t care how we do that anymore.  There are some things that the church has royally screwed up on, but despite that, there are some things that the church has done right and that is continue to spread the name of Jesus.  Anything that is done in his name and with his heart is the right method.  I criticized people for being stuck in their ways and I was the same way.  God has been teaching me to be open-minded about everything and he’s been teaching me that it’s all about Jesus.  

The truth is, I haven’t heard God speak so clear in a little while and my question to him was surprisingly, “why haven’t you been speaking?” while God was saying, “why haven’t you been listening?”  I have learned that if you are in relationship with God, he IS speaking to you.  The question is: do you hear his voice, do you recognize his voice and when he speaks, do you follow him?  I’ve had to ask recently and am still asking right now, “where are you leading now?”  I know that John 10 tells me that he’s always leading me out.  Jesus is always taking us somewhere more dangerous and more adventurous than we hope for.  He doesn’t leave us though.  He is our shepherd and he is with us.  God taught me through John 10 that life is experienced outside of the pen.  Jesus doesn’t save us from the world, he saves us to the world.  As long as we stay inside and safe, we need no shepherd and we can’t live a significant life.  

What I’m saying is, no matter what side you’re on, significant life isn’t experienced when you’re safe and secure.  I found safety in believing that I was the only one who was right.  Most people do.  Jesus doesn’t call me to that though.  He calls me to live and be something greater and something more significant and hearing his voice and following him involves following him into more dangerous and adventurous ground.  This requires us to have an open mind and an open heart and for so long I didn’t do that and as a result, I didn’t hear the voice of God.  Jesus was trying to lead me out and I couldn’t follow because I was too critical.  The scripture is true.  The thief came to rob life from me by allowing me to discount all that others are doing in the name of Jesus, simply because of their methods.  I should be joining them, for the renown of Christ.  

I just needed to put this down here and I think one of the most important questions that we can ask ourselves is, “What is God saying to me right now?”  Because he is always speaking.  The question is, are we always following?  

Reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

In the words of my friend David Hensley….

Now THAT changes EVERYTHING!

Yes, Ashley is pregnant and we are SOOOO excited about it!  She has her first appointment and ultrasound on September 30 and we’ll find out the due date and all of that, but we’re estimating it to be around May or June.  Obviously, I will keep you updated on everything that’s happening.  As of now, Ashley has some pretty crazy nausea, mostly at night, not in the morning.  I hope to be the husband that I need to be and just do it all for the next 7-8 months while Ashley has our baby in the oven.  I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am to be a dad.  

Other than that, I bought a new truck and that’s exciting for me.  It was a week of “newness” for us.  

Anything new or exciting happening in your life?

Reflect Jesus.  Love the world.

Life has felt very busy lately.  I haven’t had as much time to blog as I would like to.  Work is busy right now, which is good and things at Knox Life are getting VERY busy lately.  We will be moving to a new location in a few weeks.  We will start meeting at the new Remedy Coffeehouse at 125 Jackson Avenue in the Old City in the beginning of October.  So, this is an exciting time for us.  We have been working on the building recently and the stage is almost complete.  It is painted and stained and just needs a few coats of lacquer to finish it.  There are a few small things that we need to do in order to be ready for Sundays, so we are very excited.  

Other than those few things, I’m just getting ready to go to Owensboro, Kentucky to lead worship this weekend and it will actually be the first weekend in a year that I won’t be leading worship at Knox Life.  

Also, it’s football season and I’m so happy about that.  And because it’s football season, that also means that it’s fantasy football season.  Mine has actually started off fairly negative.  Tom Brady was my first round draft choice.  Now he’s out for the season.  That’s just bad luck if you ask me.  So, here’s hoping Jake Delhomme can pick up the slack for me.  I’m a panthers fan, so here’s hoping he does well for the panthers and for the Fountain City Fuzz (my fantasy team).  

My dad is done with this round of chemo.  He just had a scan and he is cancer-free at this time.  He’s had a very difficult, but amazing run and I’m encouraged by his attitude no matter how sick he feels and really is.  I thank God everyday for dad’s influence on my life and for God’s healing work in my dad’s body.  

I talked last blog about a few things that have been encouraging me with the church recently and I want to add a quick thought to that.  I am encouraged at the fact that so many people are asking the question of what it means to follow Christ.  The reason that’s encouraging to me is that people are trying to find the answer for themselves usually from scripture.  Christ-followers are trying to find out what it means to be Christ-followers.  What I mean by that is that the new generation of the body of Christ has begun a movement where it is more important to model their lives after the life of Christ than follow the rules set by the church that they grew up in, or the rules that their parents set for them.  It’s so important to test everything against scripture, just as Paul tells us.  That is the focus of what it means to be a Christ-follower: that we follow and model our lives after Christ.  Now don’t hear me say that our generation is better than the last.  In NO way am I saying that.  I’m only saying that I am encouraged by the conversation that is happening inside of the church today.  

So those are a few things that are happening with me.  I’ll update more often and have more conversations more often.  I’m really looking forward to the near future with Knox Life, Remedy Coffeehouse, and my long-awaited vacation (October 20).  What are you looking forward to, or what are some big things happening in your life?

As always, Reflect Jesus, Love the world.